Girl Model - The Documentary

A filmmaker in Dallas posted information about this documentary, and I wanted to spread the word.

This film follows a model recruiter as she searches for young models to send to Tokyo.  It gives a behind the scenes look at the modeling world.  Here is the website and trailer:

http://www.girlmodelthemovie.com/trailer.html

Please take the time to sneak a peek.  The producers also have a Kickstarter page and they are so close to reaching their goal.  I believe they're spreading a powerful message, and this is one small way you can help.  Make a contribution if you can.

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1528747160/girl-model

There are many ways that as women we can support each other as we battle the preconceived and impossible standards of perfection that are thrown in our faces every day.  Here are just a couple of websites you can check out.  Find out ways to get involved.  When enough people bark back, things will change but not until then.

http://www.beautyredefined.net/

http://www.hghw.org/

Best Shape of Your Life Remorse

As the Olympics continue, we all watch these perfectly sculpted bodies doing whatever it is that they do best.

Perhaps nearly all of us have experienced some remorse concerning our physical peaks.  Mine was about 3 years ago now.  I worked out for about an hour a day 5 or 6 times a week.  I didn't eat out much and my diet was restricted to exclude processed meats or cheeses, caffeine, sugar, or fried foods.  After six months of that routine I finally got down to 135 lbs and had some awesome muscle definition starting.  This was also when I was essentially acting full time.  It was part of my job and my routine to be fit and take care of myself.

Other women may have other stories.  I love the show "What Not to Wear," and on a certain episode they had a young woman who used to be a swimmer when she was in high school and early college.  As soon as she stopped swimming her body started to change.  She started to get curvier with hips and bigger boobs.  She was utterly depressed.  She missed the best shape in her life.

Although in previous blogs I've looked for solutions to help with the various heart aches that cause us women struggle.  This particular one is hard to overcome.  Perhaps you were larger, then lost a significant amount of weight only to gain it back later.  How about our yo-yo ladies who can never seem to settle on a size and their emotions take that roller coaster ride with their body?

In our lives we will live many chapters, and each chapter may be very different or familiar.  It depends on the woman.  But there's a certain remorse that I personally feel for having been in that great of shape.  From now on I will always compare my current weight and appearance to that brief year of my life.  I know that are many other women who feel this same way.  After it's been revealed to you that you actually can manage to be that in-shape/healthy it makes it more difficult to accept anything less.

And yet we must.

I don't have time to do what I did before.  But sitting in my chest of drawers are my size 4 jeans.  Like I can't give up the hope that I'll be that size again.  That's why every woman has her skinny jeans.  It's our way of not giving up.  The longer we hold onto those jeans the harder it is to appreciate your present.  To give yourself a break and full acceptance.  The disappointment or sadness that overcomes us with our reflection holds us back.  In fact, it sometimes creates more eating disorders or overeating from emotion.

Should we women of the world give up our skinny jeans??  Absolutely.  But give me one more month...we need a moment together with just the two of us.  After all, breaking up is hard to do.

Why Women Love Their Gay Men

I hear it all the time from straight guys.  "Why do girls always have at least one gay guy friend?"

You often hear in response, "They're safe."  But I think it's more than that.

It's no secret that women crave approval from men.  If you're a woman, and you've never had your own gay boy I suggest you get one as soon as possible.  Why?  They are extremely fun, fully accepting, and they encourage you to be your most beautiful self no matter what other people think.

Some of the most encouraging words I've ever received in my life have been from my gay guy friends.  They have no problem telling you that you're beautiful and fabulous.  Especially when you don't feel like it.  Then there's always the fact that if you're not looking fabulous that day they can do your hair, wardrobe, and make-up for you and magically make you feel better.

And of course, there is the safe factor.  You can listen to his compliments without the fear of manipulation just to get you into bed.  Sorry, good straight guys.  For every one good man, there's typically three losers cutting in line before you getting to the women.  And we can't always count on each other because of the competition factor.

It's that constant encouragement that makes gay men so important to us women.

Ok, ok, so I'm being stereotypical, but the point of this blog is to point out that everyone needs someone that they feel safe with who can give constant encouragement.  The words you surround yourself with are the words you will believe.  If you surround yourself with people who build you up, then you will start to believe it.

WARNING!  Too much inflation is bad for the soul.  The only way to prevent a big head is to exhale some of those compliments given to you onto others.  There's no need for superiority.  We all end up old and wrinkly on the outside, but your soul is always evolving and with a conscious effort you CAN make yourself more beautiful on the inside as the years go by.

So whether you're gay or straight, be that someone for someone else.  A good friend will offer that in return.    

"Fat Aussie Swimmer"

I just read an article about an Australian Olympian swimmer who is being judged for looking "fat" in comparison to previous years.

I have one question to the Australian media:

Can you qualify for the Olympics?  No?  Then shut your mouth.

(As a side note, I wasn't able to download the picture straight from the original article.  I thought I'd try a little experiment.  I searched "Fat Aussie Swimmer" in Google.  Guess what?  Tons of pictures of her.  Breaks your heart.)

Our American media is DEFINITELY just as bad about pointing out "fat" people in the spotlight.  Kelly Clarkson is always under heat for her weight.  Britney Spears can't win: too fat, too skinny, blah, blah, blah.

Think about the journalist that took the time to bring this swimmer's size to everyone's attention.  They would have had to have seen the athlete, taken an unattractive photo, gotten approval from their editor, written the story, and then taken it to print or get it online in this case.

Media outlets worldwide pick us apart.  Imagine!  Now this woman has to deal with criticism on a world stage and still step out in a bathing suit and compete like no one's watching.  Most of us can't even wear a bathing suit in front of our own friends without some sort of cover-up.

It's no wonder we are so obsessed with our weight.  Not even an Olympic athlete is good enough for the powers that be.  That's why it's so important to love yourself and your body.  No one else will do it for you...unless you fit their expectations.  And guess what?  Once you hit a certain age, even those women won't qualify any longer.  That beautiful woman praised for her physicality will one day also be left with no one but herself to see and love her body as-is.

Next time you see an article like this, don't jump on the band wagon.  Keep up the mental exercises.  Find something beautiful in that woman's body.  Don't judge her by calling her gross or fat.  Stick up for your fellow women.  Why shouldn't you?

(Second side note: Kelly Clarkson is an awesome role model for women, because she doesn't care.  When she loses weight it's because she wants to do it not because someone else called her fat.  She's secure in her reality of beauty, and that's rare in the entertainment industry.)

The Benefits of Phototherapy

I love watching documentaries on networks like TLC.  I have a large fascination with psychology.  It might have been one of the reasons why I went into acting in the first place.  Exploring the human mind.

There was once a documentary about a therapist in England who was starting new exploration of beneficial therapy for women with body image difficulties.  She had created a whole other use of the art of photography.

It's called phototherapy.

"I always thought of myself as a humongous whale, then I saw I looked like a concentration camp victim."  --Anorexia Journal

This concept has expanded through the years.  Gifted photographers sometimes take special training in specific courses in order to understand how to work with a person with body image disorders.  Other times therapists learn the art of photography.  Either way, I think it's a wonderful concept.

Although the image above is not very flattering, very often times the photographer aims to find the woman's natural body in its truest and most beautiful state.  The women are allowed to wear as little clothing as they feel comfortable doing, but the ultimate goal is to take a nude photo.  Photography has the amazing ability to see ourselves for how we really look.  Those that partake can range anywhere from anorexics to bulimics to overeaters to sexual abuse victims.

"I wonder what my parents will say.  I haven't confronted them with the sexual abuse memories I've been having.  Well a funny thing happened when I saw myself in those pictures.  I saw a beautiful, sad, complicated, courageous woman.  I realized the worst was really not so bad.  There was nothing wrong with me.  I didn't look like a Playboy centerfold but I didn't care.  For the first time I had sympathy for this somewhat tragic girl staring back at me in all of her vulnerable beauty."  --Incest Journal

If I knew anything about photography or owned a decent camera I would find this a wonderful way to help other women.  In my past, I have had the luck of working with many gifted photographers and I have some beautiful photos of myself.  What a self esteem booster!  Once I got the guts to do a bikini shot, but that was a beauty photo.  These photos are something different.

You can't ask just any photographer to do this.  They have to be sensitive to you.  They have to be able to capture your essence.  Your pain.  Your inner and outer beauty.  And most importantly, you have to feel comfortable enough with the photographer to be naked.  More often than not, the photographers/therapists are women.  It can work with bra and underwear, but it's my understanding that the therapy really takes hold when you confront your naked body head on.

I find, as a normal insecure woman, some sort of comfort in these other ladies' photos.  I'm so used to seeing photoshopped images, it's refreshing to see something real.  It's nice to say, "Hey, I'm not that different!"

Have you ever considered doing something like this?  It takes a huge amount of trust with the photographer, but I would imagine the results would be life changing.  I'll admit, it would terrify me.  But I wonder what I would think or feel once I saw the photos.  

If that seems a bit much for you, try this at first.  Work with a photographer who is gifted at making all women look beautiful in general.  I generally like pin-up girl photographers.  It's like a costume of sorts so that you don't feel quite so exposed.  And the pin-up world (for women) is very open to all body types of women.  You'll find yourself welcomed with open arms whether you're a size 00 or 22.  Although it's not quite the same impact as the phototherapy nudes, it's a great start.  It's one tiny step to be able to look at yourself outside of the mirror...and I think that's something we could all use.

If you try either one, let me know how it affected you.  I think it's a beneficial venture.

**Phototherapy photos and quotes taken from http://photographytherapy.com/index.htm.  Pin-up photo from http://www.kabloomstudios.com/blog/pretty-as-a-pin-up-vintage-style/.

Should Transvestites Compete with Women?

In the last year there was a controversy about the winner of the Canadian beauty pageant.  The winner was a transvestite.  It suddenly became an issue.  What to do?  They eventually decided to let her compete.

Beauty and the Curves is about to get controversial.

She protested that she was being disqualified for "being born."

What is my humble blogger opinion?

SHE DOES NOT QUALIFY.

*Gasp*

As a costumer, I have worked with and been around a lot of drag queens.  Seen many drag shows.  Wanna know a drag queen tip?  Use clear dance floor tape.  It works best.

"What's that got to do with the pageant?"  I also know the lengths that these originally born men go to in order to look like a woman.

"But he used drug therapy and surgery and now he's a she!"

Here's my beef.

He is a manufactured she.  She got to choose her cheek bones, the size of her breasts, the curve of her hips, how plump her lips will be....and the list goes on.  Every day women don't choose these things.  We're born with them and then we have to learn to love and accept them the way they are.  Which is a huge struggle.  A struggle that profits companies millions of dollars every year, because we can't seem to like our natural selves.  Now you're telling us that we're having to compete against someone who composed herself completely surgically?!  We can't win!

"What about other women in the pageant who have also had plastic surgery?"

I have many friends who have breast implants and have used plastic surgery.  I am not an advocate for plastic surgery for vanity purposes.  In every case, I can confidently say, "You looked beautiful before."  In light of my opinion on that, it makes sense for me to follow by saying,

Plastic surgery should not be allowed in ANY beauty pageant.

I want to see natural beauty.  I want to see a woman who loves herself and advocates all sizes of women.  A woman who eats right and exercises.  My artistic eye prefers to see a very slender woman with smaller breasts.  The large, fake ones don't look right.  They're not proportionate.  Sure I have larger breasts, but I also have larger than average hips.  Most models' hips are 32" or 34".  My hips are 39".  So does it not make sense that the model would be an A or a B cup and I'm a DD?  We're talking 5-7" difference!  And I'm convinced that one is just as beautiful as the other.

Quit making us women live up to an unobtainable fantasy.  The only way to compete with a manufactured woman is to manufacture yourself.  If Jenna (Miss Canada) felt the need to alter her entire body for her happiness, that's her beef.  That's not what I'm about.  In fact, it's the complete OPPOSITE of what I'm about.  I'm about finding happiness in who you are and how you were created.  I'm not going to delve into the transvestite argument of whether it's right or wrong.  But I will say this.

I wish Jenna could've loved herself no matter what.  Even as a man.  
 

We have a History of Dysmorphia

body dysmorphic disorder

 noun

: pathological preoccupation with an imagined or slight physical defect of one's body to the point of causing significant stress or behavioral impairment in several areas (as work and personal relationships)

The other day I was picking up something for work.  As I jumped into my car and turned the key to start the engine, I looked up and my jaw dropped.  

Walking into the store that I had just left was a woman of approximately 45 or so.  She was clearly anorexic.  And I'm not exaggerating.  She couldn't have weighed more than 85 or 90 lbs and she looked to be at least 5'7".  She wore a t-shirt and jeans.  I suppose it was an attempt cover her frail body.  I wasn't sure how she was walking.

It was one of those moments where I screamed in my head, "Somebody help her!  She's clearly dying.  Are we going to just sit back and watch this woman walk around when she is so obviously committing a slow and cruel death to her body?  Would we let someone walk around with a gunshot wound and do nothing?"

Of course I know it's not realistic for someone to stop her and make her go to a hospital, but I wish it were possible.

Obviously anorexia is a severe eating disorder.  It's a physical manifestation of the emotional and psychological warfare going on within the person's head...and soul.  

Unfortunately, I think each of us women have a touch of that thinking within us.  Body dysmorphia is much more common and is dictated by our unique cultures.  You see, us ladies, have never been happy with our natural bodies.

As soon as our sewing techniques developed the corset began.  The enlightenment of the Renaissance quickly started the era of the corset.  Although through the hundreds of years the shape of the corset shifted, it was always present.  The attempt was to maintain a waist of approximately 17"-19".  This was the effect:

                              

 Pregnant ladies were to stay in the home until her baby bump was gone.  In fact, in Victorian times it was considered inappropriate to see a noticeably pregnant woman in public.  With that in mind, the women would wear their corsets as long as possible causing damage to the baby.  Even men during the Victorian era wore corsets.

With the roaring 1920s women rebuked the standards and wanted to rid themselves of such restraints.  They went the opposite direction.  They wanted to look more like men.  Their silhouettes were straight up and down.  They didn't want curves to be noticeable at all.  They chopped their hair off and hated large breasts.  The straighter your pearls hung down your chest the better...meaning the flatter the better.

The depression was a game changer and as the wars started, women went back to their roots of being the caregiver or going to work while their husbands fought.  As the men came home, femininity was more important.  We started to like and appreciate curves.  In fact, women were trying to gain weight to be curvier.  Bullet bras and undergarments helped keep the body in perfect curves.

As women craved more independence and rights, we stripped ourselves of our undergarments and went free.

This is when I think we started down a different path of dysmorphia.  Now we have Spanx and other polyester helpers, but we revere "true" beauty as a woman who doesn't use any undergarments.  We now believe that Playboy defines beauty. And guess what are the beauty tools of choice.  Photoshop.  Plastic surgery.

Not that the previous variations of body dysmorphia were healthy for the human body in any way, but now we have a greater mind game involved.  

We must be perfect naked.

So we stand in front of the mirror and start to pick apart our bodies.  We look at Spanx as cheating.  So now we're resorting to knives and starvation as our corsets.  Always in search for perfection.

I do it too.  I'm super guilty of standing in front of the mirror and pushing my love handles back so I can't see them.  I've been told, "You're the perfect candidate for lipo suction!"

Um, thanks?

Whatever this is in us women that feels this need to alter our bodies has always been with us.  You're not alone.  You're not a freak.  Your imperfections are perfectly normal.  Those models with the airbrushing are the "freaks."  Meaning, they are unusual.  They are certainly beautiful, and I don't want to dismiss beautiful healthy women at all.  But with our world shrinking, the media can find the most beautiful women in the world and flaunt them as "norm."  It's a psychological game that we fall into on a daily basis.  

Define your own reality.  What is your "norm?"  What can you appreciate in the world's most beautiful women?  More importantly, what can you appreciate in your own beauty?  In the women in your real life?  Take a moment to look at another woman's flaw in a positive light.  Don't judge her out of jealousy or hate.  Find her beauty.  The more you find beauty in the flaws of the women in your own life, the easier it will be to appreciate your own flaws.  You will slowly start to redefine your reality and your normal state of beauty.  We have been fooled.  Beauty is not just physical.  Beauty is mental.  Emotional.  Psychological.  

Beauty is what you define it to be.  Your own beauty is defined by you.

Nothing ever fits right! Wish I was skinny....

Have lots of you ever thought or said this phrase out loud?

There was a brief time when I was a size four.  I, strangely, started to miss my extra curves, but the shopping experience was AWESOME!  Everything fit!!  And I mean everything.  I just picked up a size four and it fit.  It seems once you wander past that size, everything seems to go wrong doesn't it?

Among the many things I've managed to do in my short time out of college, I worked in a couture fabric store.  I had a friend who was a clothing designer, and I got all kinds of dirt on the manufacturing of clothes.

Ignorance is bliss, except when it comes to women trying on clothes.

Some days this is me:

Then other days it's a total crash landing.....

But let me educate you on the production of clothing in our country and it might make you feel a little better.

As we all know too well (especially with Ralph Lauren being so brazen as to manufacture our Olympic uniforms in China) the majority of our clothes are not made in America.  There are a couple of ways that a company can choose to handle its production.

You see, each race of woman is constructed differently.  We have huge varying degrees of "typical" measurements.  The example I like to use that is easiest to understand is the apex measurement.  The apex measurement is literally from nipple to nipple.

European women tend to have wide apexes, American women tend to be somewhere in between, and Asian woman (surprise!) are the smallest.  If a company does all of its fitting overseas, then they are basing their fit on Asian women.  Now this doesn't mean that there is no cross over between races.  I'm as white as can be my but apex is that of a typical Asian woman, which means I have absolutely no problem finding shirts that fit great.  The hips on the other hand.....

Everyone jokes that there are "black women" stores.  That's for a reason.  Black women also tend to have different typical measurements.  So, in other words, some companies are trying to force all women into an Asian mold and it just ain't gonna happen.

If you move up in value in your clothing a little you will start to find that the fit is better because they do the fittings in America...with American women.  That doesn't mean that everything will fit properly, but you stand a better chance.  

They have to eventually settle on a standard size for clothing, but stores like Express are exploring different body types as lines of clothing.  Nothing fits me better than a pair of Express curvy cut jeans.

So now you know.  So when you freak out over clothes not fitting in a store, leave that store.  All of their measurements are going to be based on the same fit model, and if that fit model doesn't fit you then don't waste your time.  The key is to find a store that you like that has your typical body measurements down to a science and stick with it.

Just one more weapon for shopping......other than an emotional cup of ice cream at the end of it all to make it all better.   

Bikinis, Texas

So this is an article that came out today:

http://www.inquisitr.com/279437/bikinis-texas-restaurant-owner-changes-name-of-bankersmith-to-bikinis/

The gist of it is that some rich guy bought a town not too far from my hometown.  There haven't been any inhabitants of this town for some time, so he's going to fix it up and rename it.  It shall be named...

Bikinis, Texas

There was one time when I was out of college, and I had a very unbearable living situation.  I couldn't get out though, because I didn't make enough money to survive on my own.  I was desperate, and I started to drive.

I was going to get a job at Hooters.

I couldn't think of a faster, easier way for me to make some quick money.  I mean, other than drugs or stripping, right?  I knew a girl in high school who worked at Hooters.  So this is what I had been brought to.  I literally cried on my way there.  For me, ultra conservative, this might have well been stripping.

Let's just say I got my head on straight and turned the car around.  I never worked at Hooters.  Or Twin Peaks.  Or Big Racks.  Or Tilted Kilt.  Who can name another one??

Then as I was pursuing my career in film acting, I had a big callback for a TV show.  The basis of the show was that I was to be the "girl next door" host type.  I would need to have the ability to write my own scripts, interview on the fly and in exchange I would travel around filming locations that originated types of alcohol.  For those not in the acting world, a "callback" is like a second interview.  It means you might very well get the job.

The original audition consisted of me opening with a script I'd written then doing an interview.  The New York director and producer were watching live via Skype.  So when I got the callback, I was excited. Until I opened the email.

In the email was a link to a clip of previous shows with the last host.  It was then that I discovered that the host was really not a vital role and in fact was merely there to keep the show going while girls in tiny bikinis took body shots off of each other and pranced around half naked acting ditzy and drunk.

I didn't go to the callback.

I called my agent and said I didn't want to participate.

This is probably how people would picture me.  Homely.  Like I protest these things because I'm ugly, and I wouldn't be able to even qualify to be one of these girls.

Lame.  And just another judgmental joke that is thrown in our faces. 

But as long as there are women willing to do anything, these sorts of institutions will continue.  Think about it.  If every woman said "no," what could these business owners do?  Absolutely nothing.  They wouldn't exist.

As women we don't have enough inner positive thinking to dismiss such an opportunity.  Imagine if we thought this way:

"I look great!" "I'm a smart girl."  "There are other girls just as pretty or even prettier, but there's only one me.  And that's a valuable asset."

If we had all of these positive thoughts running through our minds, we wouldn't have enough room for a lame compliment.  If you have your own fantastic thoughts about yourself then some stranger saying, "Hey honey, you look hot" doesn't nearly measure up to "I'm an accomplished learner who is pretty, a good listener, and caring towards people."  We're assuming that you ARE nice to people....I'll follow that up in another blog for another day..... 

So let's encourage each other to fill our days with positive thinking instead of empty searches for artificial attention. 

What Does a Man Want?

Perky, huge boobs.  Tiny waist.  Little hips with a perfectly round butt.  Thighs without cellulite.  Long, thin legs.  Thick long hair.  Pouty lips.  Big eyes that are any color but brown with long, thick lashes.  Something like this, right?

















Now stop!!!

Take a deep breath.  You just listed everything that YOU tell a man he wants.  Would a man refuse the dream woman?  Of course not!  But that's not necessarily what he wants.  Let's be fair.  A real man wants a real woman.

You think he notices every little flaw, every little detail that drives you nuts and makes you want to cry or have lipo suction on a regular basis?  Come on now....he doesn't even notice when you get a haircut, does he?

(I would like to take this moment to insert that I am the least observant woman ever and am often beat out by even men noticing details.)

So here's the great thing about guys: they see the big picture.  He doesn't see the cellulite like you do.  He doesn't notice that your panties cause a dent in your love handles thus causing you to have the appearance of not two big hips but FOUR.  As women we're designed to focus on the details, and men are designed to see the big picture.  It's one of the many fascinating ways that we perfectly balance each other.

Wanna know what he REALLY notices?  How pretty you know you are naturally.

Men see through fake self confidence with amazing x-ray abilities.  Depending upon the guy they either take advantage of a girl trying too hard, or (if they're interested in something long lasting) they look for a girl who can shower walk out the door in 15 minutes flat while still exuding that glow of inner beauty.

Sure, there are an enormous amount of men who are pigs.  I'm not denying that.  But in my little world, we don't men bash.  And what's more important.....

The right guy loves you even when you're a hot mess.  In fact, he will absolutely confuse the hell out of you by complimenting you right after you've have one of your secret crying sessions about your weight, wondering how he could possibly find you attractive, and wishing for that lipo wand again.

Here's my challenge for you today: when a man compliments you, BELIEVE HIM.

Quit with your mind games.

Man: Wow, you look great!

Most Women's Minds:  "He's lying."  "He's doesn't know what he's talking about."  "What does he want from me?"  "He's just manipulating me to get me in a better mood."  "He obviously hasn't looked close enough today...."  Blah, blah, blah.

Correct Woman's Mind:  "Oh, that's so nice.  Guess I do look great!"

I'm sure I'll talk a lot more about positive thinking later, but let's start with this tiny but VERY difficult challenge.

Hey, by the way....you look great today  :-)

Munching Numbers

I wait patiently for the next woman.  I see her rounding the corner.  She ducks her head, chuckles uncomfortably, and slowly makes her way towards me.  In her eyes is sheer fear...possibly light tears.  She looks to me like I am bound to embarrass her and prey upon her insecurities.  She rubs her sweaty palms down the side of her pants.  She can't avoid it any longer.

"Be nice.  I've been on a diet.  And I'm trying to lose weight.  Do you need me to suck in?  Can you plan on me losing 20lbs in the next three weeks?"

...or...

"I have nothing up top.  This is all bra.  Is that a problem?  I'm sorry."

"Don't change a thing," I reply.

And I really don't want her to change anything.  Why?  Because I'm her costumer.  And if she really does lose 20lbs in the next three weeks or suddenly get a boob job my entire design and fit will be terribly off.  But who can blame her fright?  I've made her confront the one thing women hate the most: a tape measure.

So let's get real and honest.  I'll start.  My current measurements are 37/29/39, I'm 5'4", and I weigh 143lbs.  I'm a 34DD and approximately a size 8.  

GASP!

I know, I know.  I weigh more than 110lbs, AND I confessed it.  What is the world coming to?!

I have been a professional costumer for going on eight years now.  I have seen A LOT of measurements.  They don't scare me...most days.  I'll admit I'd rather be munching on a Snickers bar than munching on my own numbers.  This is the classic reaction to my measurements:

"You don't look like you weigh that much."

Women.  Really.  Why do we say things like that to each other?  You ever notice that if a woman tells another woman she looks like she's lost weight, it's automatically a compliment?  Sometimes I have the strange desire to suddenly freak out that I've lost weight and immediately start planning on how to gain it back.  Just to gauge a reaction.  Perhaps you should say instead, "You're looking great these days."  Now, your fellow woman's response will most likely automatically be, "Thanks, I've been on a diet."

Don't be afraid of your numbers.  I know this is what we want to be like:

But this is probably closer to the truth:

And that's OK!  You have one life.  Don't live it obsessing.  Do what you can, love your numbers, and move on.

What are your numbers?  Can you admit them without crying, hitting a wall with your head, or giggling uncomfortably?  Try it.  Say them out loud.  Tell them to another woman like it ain't no thang but a chicken wing.  

Mmmm.....chicken wings.......

An Introduction

Allow me to introduce myself.  I'm a 30 year old woman experienced in the wild dating world, an independent little working bee, and a sort of self-proclaimed all around artist.  I grew up in south Texas, attended a private Christian University, and made the terribly regrettable decision to obtain a bachelor's degree in Theater.

I decided to start this blog as an outlet for women.  Real women.  Just like me.  Not the high maintenance girls you find at the bar looking for a man to spend money on her.  I'm plain Jane.  I get up, go to work (most days without make-up), take care of my puppy, spend time with my boyfriend, and try to pay my bills on time.

I spent several years very actively pursuing a career in film acting until one day I stopped.  Cold turkey.  My desire went slack.  That was it.  I was tired of the demands placed on actresses and women in general by those know-it-alls behind the wobbly tables and tired cameras.  They were running my life, and I was tired of it.  It was time for me to run my own life.

In this blog, I will share my stories, daily experiences, and everything that goes into being a woman in this ridiculous and fickle culture we've developed here in America.

Welcome to Beauty and the Curves.